Mother-Daughter Drama Episode 4 - Up to you lah

It has been a while since our last drama episode. Owh, trust me, it was not because the lack of drama between me and Sara, it was more because of my procrastination habit.

Last 4-5 months (I think), I had just came back home from work in a bad mood with all the crappy nonsense in the office. I wanted to bathe Sara, I took her pyjamas, opened her clothes, and bathe her. No drama. Yet.

She's such a chatterbox in the bathroom and we always enjoy our bath session. Then, I dried her and started to put on the clothes that I took out earlier. She started whining "Yaya don't want to wear this one, want to wear another one". I conceded "Okay, which one?"

She showed me another set of pjs, but when I started to put on the clothes to her, the former scene ensues. Repeat three times. Now, can you imagine my frustration and anger at that time? I threw all her clothes on the bed, and told her "Up to you lah Sara, choose whatever you want, Mummy don't care"

I guess she can hear the strain in my voice, and knows that I'm already at my limit, so she did the next best thing. She cried, on top of her lung. Resulting in of course everybody coming in the room and asking what went wrong (which of course added to my annoyance..hehe)

Since that, the phrase "Up to you lah" has always been extra sensitive to her. If she gets really stubborn and we say "Up to you lah" to her, she'll immediately apologized "Sowwy, sowwy mummy, yaya don't want mummy to angry yaya. Sowwy mummy. Don't say up to you. Sowwy mummy" Hihi, it's funny and heartbreakingly sweet at the same time.

Last week, we went outing together and as usual, she insisted to sit with me at the shotgun position. Its getting hard adjusting to her chubby body (18kgs, 97cm) and mummy's growing tummy. So, I said to her "Sara sit in front la ye, babah drive, Sara sit beside babah. Mummy sit at the back ye?" And she pleaded "No lah, mummy sit with yaya la. Yaya want to sit with mummy. Pleeeaaassseee".

I tried negotiating "Okay, we sit at the back together, nak?" She replied "We sit in front la. Yaya hot, nak aircond". After several minutes of coaxing, she suddenly looked up to me, and said with a very strained voice "Up to you la mummy, want to sit at the back ke, want to sit in front ke" *___*

And guess what I did? I succumbed, I sat in front with her. I swear I can see the glint of amusement in her eyes afterward. Gosh, to think that I am being psyched and manipulated by a two-year-old. I blame it on the pregnancy hormones! ;p

Mother-daughter drama episode 3 : The sulking baby

I usually come back from work just in time to take Sara for a simple walk around our housing area. According to Nenek, she'll usually wait for us (me, Atuk, Ciksu or Cikngah) in front of the door and will light up whenever we come back.

She'll then wear her slipper, come to us and say "Mummy, walk walk walk. Come!". However, yesterday, all of us came back late. Sara has been waiting since 6.00pm. She sat in front of the door, waiting patiently. My mum told me that each time a car passed by, she'd ask "Mummy?" and poor Nenek had to say "No, not yet. mummy hasn't come back yet".

When I came back (around 7.30pm), she was lying down on the spread in the living room with her Babah. I gently nudged her "Hi Sara. Sorry for coming back so late". I tried to kiss her, she pushed me away. She kept saying "Nanak, nanak mummy. Baba..." *Nanak = No Now, when she prefers hubby than me, it means that she really is angry and hurt.

My mom told me that she's been waiting for me and now she's sulking. My heart broke into a million pieces. She continued lying down, never really looked at my face. I told her stories, I asked her about the rabbit next door, still she refused to answer.

I asked her whether she wants to eat rice, she nod (without looking at me). When I offered to carry her to the kitchen, she cried "NANAK! BABA, YI (baba, carry)" I almost smiled. God, she sulks just like me. (It is quite funny in retrospect).

She held on to her Baba and didn't even want to sit on my lap (usually she'll sit on my lap while I feed her rice). I feed her rice and continue talking to her until she caves. We traded stories, she told me about her day, how she play cook-cook with bibik, how there was two dogs chasing her, how the rabbit next door eat and drink, how she ate three kakek (chocolate) and I know her sulking is almost over.

Halfway through the eating session, she looked up to me, pat my hips and say "Mummy, down" meaning she wants to sit down on my lap. Hubby groaned and laughed. And with that, I know her sulking is officially over.

Mother-daughter drama episode 2 : Don't Hit People!

So, the little kid has learned something new, hitting people on the face! Gahhhh! Makes me sooooo mad! I know that some people may think that I'm such a tyrant for getting mad at her, but I believe that with Sara, I can afford to be that way. You see, she understands that I forbid her to do so (hitting people on the face) but still, she does it regularly. Especially to Cik Ngah.

The first few time she hit people (including me) in the face, I'd just go like "Sara, don't hit people in the face. It's not nice and it hurts. Ok?" with patience. When she keeps on doing it, my patience starts to wear thin, so I'd say (with more stern voice) "Sara, don't hit people! How many times Mummy have to tell you! Not nice!" (notice the punctuation?)

She even hits her Nenek on the face without no apparent reason. So, my reflex reaction took control over me and I hit her on the back. Not hard, but I know she felt it. And, she didn't cry, she didn't even shed one tear. I immediately regretted my action and thought to myself that this is not the way to discipline her.

All of us (me, hubby, Nenek, Cik Su, Cik Ngah except for Atuk of course!) have taken turns advising her that in the end resorted to yelling at her each time she hit people. Until one day, we sort of ganged up on her and did not talk or play with her at all because she hits Cik Su and Cik Ngah.

We acted really solid that time, we didn't even look at her. She came over to us (we were in front of the TV, she was playing on her own), nudge us but we maintained our facade. We started saying things like "Don't want to friend with Sara. You hit Cik Su and Cik Ngah" She goes off to amuse herself as if what we said didn't matter to her.

About 10 minutes after that, she came over to us again, and suddenly laugh her cute little laughter (complete with covering her mouth like we do, when we laugh) and clapping her hand, trying to be funny. At first, we tried to maintain our angry face, but who can resist, right? When a cute little kid is trying to make peace, its just too charming and we laugh right along with her.

I ask her nicely "Sara, salam Cik Su. Say sorry. Salam Cik Ngah too. Say sorry to everybody" She walked to Cik Su and Cik Ngah, grabbed their hands and goes emm-mmaahhh. She even kisses everybody on the cheek. Huh, pandai betul ambik hati.

And as usual, the fight is over. For now. ;)

Pic has nothing to do with the story. I was just inspired by her to put up Sara's naked photos.

Mother-daughter drama episode 1 : Nak!

I had a bad day that day and was feeling rather tired while Sara has been acting up lately. So, when I put her in her highchair, she screamed (oh, she doesn't do the cute cry nowadays, she just SCREAMED. A LOT.). I feed her, she screamed. I put her on my lap, she screamed. OKAY.

I put her on the floor, still she screamed and refuse to stand up. So, I asked in a stern and angry voice "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!".

She looked at me with huge eyes brimming with tears, points to the weetameal biscuit tin and says "Nak!". I opened the tin, gave her half of a biscuit (which she declines) because she wanted a ROUND biscuit. FINE.

And when I gave her the biscuit, a magical thing happened. She looked at me with thankful eyes and I couldn't help but to stifle a laughter. And my anger, my frustration just instantly vapourized replaced by a yearning to apologize, forgive and forget.

I urged her gently "Kiss Mummy". She lean forward and emmm-mmahh. I kissed her back and said that I'm sorry. And that's the end of our first fight.

Now, if only all of our future fights can be resolved like that... (which I am sure will happen in many more of mother-daughter drama episodes to come)

Budak tecit nakal yang duduk atas perut Mummy tanak pandang camera